MORE NETWORK BLOG

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ByAnna Marie Graham on Monday, April 6, 2020

Welcome Home! Or maybe not?

Anna Marie Graham By Anna Marie Graham on Monday, April 6, 2020

 

What can churches do to help their missionaries who have returned back to Canada?

"Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience" - Colossians 3:12

This question of returning missionaries is especially relevant now, as we see many cross-cultural workers/missionaries returning suddenly and unexpectedly from their country of service, due to COVID-19 or due to other unexpected circumstances. 

Coming "Home"

Do missionaries still experience culture shock? Isn’t that an outdated idea now that we are so connected worldwide and are used to travelling back and forth between countries?  

In reality, returning to your passport country - the country where you can live without a visa or other restrictions - may not feel like returning homeIt may actually feel more like re-entering your homeland or a even a new entry to a new country.

Surprising?

No matter how prepared we try to be, transition and change are stressful.

And transition is much harder when we do not have time to prepare or we were forced into the change by unexpected circumstances. If a missionary was not expecting to leave their location of service, they may have not been able to say goodbye to the people they love and care about, or pack up their belongings, or finish the work they had hoped to do. The children of missionaries may have lost friends, school and belongings. These things can also be experienced by workers who did not leave unexpectedly.

Nothing and no one can replace these kinds of losses.

Caring for Returning Missionaries

We as the body of Christ, the church in Canada, can play an important role in listening and caring for these brothers and sisters who are hurting and/or who have faith-filled stories to tell us.  

 “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” I John 4:11 

Here are 10 Things the Church in Canada can do to care for Missionaries when they return to Canada:

10 Ways your Church can Care for Missionaries Returning to Canada

1. Listen to their story! Ask returning missionaries about their life and experiences. Choose a few trusted people in the church with whom they can debrief their cross-cultural experience. 

2. Stay in touch regularly with returning missionaries, checking in with them with prayer and encouragement, by phone, internet, etc. (especially if they are in quarantine). Assign a small number of people in the church to communicate with them, so that they are not overwhelmed with too many contacts or questions. 

3. Give them time to rest and recover if that’s what they want and need. Balance this with staying in touch with them. Consider and discuss with them about postponing any public speaking at your church until they have had time to rest.  

4. Acknowledge and realize that missionaries are going through a BIG transition - maybe bigger than when they left Canada and moved to their country of ministry. Canada may not feel like “home”, especially for their children or for missionaries who have lived away from Canada for many years. 

5. Acknowledge that missionaries returning to Canada are grieving. They have lost friends, ministry role, home, usual routines, connections, etc. 

6. Offer practical help: clothing, housing, food, community resources, money, etc 

7. Consider and ask what their children need. 

8. Communicate and coordinate with their mission agency as needed. 

9. Help returning missionaries find community resources such as counselling, debriefing & spiritual direction as needed. 

10. Pray for your missionaries and pray with them.  

Next Steps

Are you already doing any of these things to care for returning missionaries? Are there items on the list that you want to start doing?

The MORE Network is a Collaborative of Canada-wide organizations supporting missionaries in cross-cultural transition. For more information on resources, events & retreats, and care for missionaries returning to Canada, please visit the MORE Network

Recommended Reading 

 


Anna Marie is a Missionary & Clinical Counsellor with the MORE Network. She has been married to Doug for 40+ years, has 2 children and several grandchildren and lives in Vancouver, BC. She has provided counselling and Member Care in Asia for 12 years in several locations. Her passion is to help missionaries and their families through grief, pain and loss while in various stages of transition. She understands just how difficult it can be transitioning in and out of cross-cultural ministry. She holds a nursing degree (BScN) and counselling degrees (Master of Arts in Counseling) and is recognized as a Registered Clinical Counsellor and Canadian Certified Counsellor. 



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Did you miss our past blogs? Check them out below!

 

Returning Home for the First Time

It was the 17th of November 2023. Our Biman Bangladesh Airlines evening flight began its somewhat rocky decent into Dhaka, Bangladesh. The city sprawled for miles with concrete apartment buildings as far as the eye could see. I was travelling with my wife, Reaghan, and our friends, Emma and Mitchell. This was the first time I’d be setting foot in the city and country I spent the first 12 years of my life in as an MK (Missionary Kid)...

Read more...

5 Ways to Pray for MORE Network in 2024

At the MORE Network, the key verse we’ve chosen for 2024 is Exodus 33:14: “The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” Exodus 33:14 (NIV)

Prior to this verse, God had told Moses to lead the Israelites to a land flowing with milk and honey but that He would not go with them. In response Moses says in verse 15, “If your presence will not go with me, do not bring us up from here.”

Just as Moses did not want to go forward without God, neither do we in the MORE Network. Not only do we want God to direct us in the way we should go in 2024, but we also want His presence to go with us.

Here are 5 Areas of Prayer for the MORE Network in 2024! 

Read more...

Lament of a Returning Missionary

Loosely based on Psalm 13, here is a prayer of lament of a returning missionary. 

How long, Lord, will I miss our former HOME where I sobbed in frustration and prayed, pounding on heaven’s door to learn language(s) & culture, and how to buy food and learn to survive, let alone thrive? ...

 

Read more...

Christmas Memories from Around the World

Watermelon, Handprints and Fireworks ... What do they all have in common? They are all elements of favourite Christmas memories and traditions from our MORE Network staff, from around the world! 

Read more...

Deeply Rooted

We invite you to join us during this season of generosity so that, together, we can give Missionary Kids and their families the opportunities to experience a richer soil in Christ and broader branches in community. 

Read more...

The Eternal Benefits of Debriefing

I recently returned from RE-VIEW, a week-long family debriefing retreat, where I served as an adult facilitator and debriefer.

While there, I had the honour of hearing the stories of missionaries who have worked in the overseas ministry context for many years. And boy, did I feel inadequate for the task as some of them had faithfully served a lifetime, having much more cross-cultural experience than I have and the wisdom that accompanies such incredible life experiences.

But what struck me the most and motivated me all the more to listen, was that many of these seasoned missionaries never had the opportunity to actually share their full stories with anyone – that is their deeply personal and valuable stories, the good, the bad and the ugly. And that’s really a reflection and a limitation of our modern missionary movement; missionaries often feel obligated to share only the positive experiences and their successes, lest they be judged or misunderstood, or worse, lose vital financial or personal support...

Read more...

Bonds Beyond Borders: The Impact of ReBoot on MKs

There is something so beautiful about the quick bonds that form between MKs (Missionary Kids), who understand each other despite having drastically different life experiences. It’s like a breath of fresh air to be surrounded by people who have gone through similar life experiences. It helps you to share on a more honest and intimate level.

Each year, the MORE Network runs Classic ReBoot, a re-entry retreat for missionaries’ kids (MKs) aged 17-20 returning to life in Canada. This is a crucial time in the lives of these young adults, many of whom are not only adjusting to a new culture, but also to new schools, jobs, relationships, and living situations.

In this article, Malik, shares about his own experience at Classic ReBoot, as well as an inside scoop from attendees of the most recent Classic ReBoot!

Read more...

Adult Third Culture Kid Research: The Heart Behind the Research

This summer, we had the privilege of connecting with Shelly Lyons about her research on Adult Third Culture Kids. Listen in to hear more about the “heart” behind the research and her big picture dreams for how it will be used! 

Adult Third Culture Kids (ATCK) are adults whose lives were shaped by mobility and cross-cultural experiences during their childhood. According to Merriam Webster, a “Third Culture Kid (TCK)” refers to "a child who grows up in a culture different from the one in which his or her parents grew up ... The 'third culture' to which the term refers is the mixed identity that a child assumes, influenced both by their parents' culture and the culture in which they are raised."

Read more...

Is Competition a Biblical Value?

One Sunday morning in the church where I pastored, a family came to me and shared how some of their friends had left our church to go to another church: a "competitor church". They were completely distracted by their news. Does the Bible encourage us to compete with fellow believers? Is there such a thing as a competitor church?

Read more...

Returning Home for the First Time
It was the 17 th of November 2023. Our Biman Bangladesh Airlines evening flight began its somewhat rocky decent into Dhaka, Bangladesh. The city sprawled for miles with concrete apartment buildings as far as the eye co...
Read more...
5 Ways to Pray for MORE Network in 2024
At the MORE Network, the key verse we’ve chosen for 2024 is Exodus 33:14: “The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” Exodus 33:14 (NIV) Prior to this verse, God had told Moses to l...
Read more...
Lament of a Returning Missionary
Loosely based on Psalm 13, here is a prayer of lament of a returning missionary.  How long, Lord, will I miss our former HOME where I sobbed in frustration and prayed, pounding on heaven’s door to learn language(s...
Read more...
Christmas Memories from Around the World
Watermelon, Handprints and Fireworks ... What do they all have in common? They are all elements of favourite Christmas memories and traditions from our MORE Network staff, from around the world! 
Read more...
Deeply Rooted
We invite you to join us during this season of generosity so that, together, we can give Missionary Kids and their families the opportunities to experience a richer soil in Christ and broader branches in community. 
Read more...
The Eternal Benefits of Debriefing
I recently returned from RE-VIEW, a week-long family debriefing retreat, where I served as an adult facilitator and debriefer. While there, I had the honour of hearing the stories of missionaries who have worked in...
Read more...
Bonds Beyond Borders: The Impact of ReBoot on MKs
There is something so beautiful about the quick bonds that form between MKs (Missionary Kids), who understand each other despite having drastically different life experiences. It’s like a breath of fresh air to be surro...
Read more...
Adult Third Culture Kid Research: The Heart Behind the Research
This summer, we had the privilege of connecting with Shelly Lyons about her research on Adult Third Culture Kids. Listen in to hear more about the “heart” behind the research and her big picture dreams for how it will b...
Read more...
Is Competition a Biblical Value?
One Sunday morning in the church where I pastored, a family came to me and shared how some of their friends had left our church to go to another church: a "competitor church". They were completely distracted by their ne...
Read more...
Deny Yourself: My Story of Self-Denial & Abundant Life
“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” -Mark 8:34 I still remember the moment I heard the words of Mark 8, grasping their significance for the first time. Si...
Read more...